Everyone Needs a Boat

Why is it that sports always reward things that don’t have a purpose? Like, is physical activity for the sake of itself really so wonderful? It’s great that you can plant a pole in the ground and hurl yourself over a bar, but…that’s not going to be useful, ever, period. Jumping a long distance in some sand, same deal. Kicking a ball into a net…not a transferable skill, in anyway. So what we have here is a system that supports only itself, and has no effect on life outside.

Not like something useful such as fishing. You’ll never see fishing as an Olympic sport, even though it’s more useful than literally everything else people do there. You’re never going to see anyone fitting a fishing rod holder to the side of a boat in record time, which is something you may actually have to do to survive, if the world is overtaken by zombies, or nuclear war, or nuclear zombies.

Alright, so I’m a bit of a survivalist and I’m prepping for the worst, plus it’s tough being in my positions because no one wants to believe you. I’m not saying you need to invest in marine welding and fabrication to build a boat large enough to hold all of humanity right now, this instant, because there’s going to be a huge tidal wave that destroys all major cities. I’m not saying that. I just think it’s good to be prepared, and people scoff at me for it. I have all the tools to catch my own fish and live off them indefinitely; is that such a bad thing? I keep my personal custom made aluminium plate boat in perfect working condition in case there’s a bit of flash flooding. That’s perfectly normal.

But if the world does end tomorrow and I have to build a new life floating through the debris, catching nuclear fish, then I get to say that I told them so. Because I did. Every week in my letters to the editor, which never get published for some reason.